It’s been 5 days since my “stumble” and the outcome is surprising…
Today is day 56 since I started my ‘project’ to reduce and/or stop drinking. As you may know, on day 51, I had some beers socially (OK) and then decided to conduct an experiment by drinking a high alcohol beer at home. See the previous day 51 post for more.
Anyway, rather than rekindling my desire to drink, as one might have expected, my experience with drinking left me with a fraction of the urge to drink that I had previously!
Until the experiment, I had this constant little voice in my head, fueled by my own curiosity and scientific urge to compare and contrast.
That voice would tell me daily, “Maybe today is the day…” and “I wonder if just one is OK right now.. it’s been over a month…” and other things. It was very much like the little devil sitting on my shoulder trying to get me to do bad things.
But, once I gave-in to the ‘devil’ in a controlled manner, it made him go away. That curious part of my mind was satisfied and I knew what the drinking was like compared to sobriety.
You see, I had been drinking continuously leading up to this project, so I didn’t really know what it felt like to be drunk any longer — it was a normal state for me. But, having been sober for a long time, and then drinking again allowed my mind to get a clear grasp on the differences and effects. I completed the compare-and-contrast.
And with that night, the nagging voice is gone.
My urge to drink is a fraction of what it was prior. Maybe 1/10th. And when I do get an urge to drink, it’s not to get blasted, but simply because the flavor sounds good, or in some cases, to pass the time as something to do. But, I’ve not really had the urge to even get buzzed since that night.
This whole thing is contrary to what many people would probably have happen, so I’m certainly not advocating that you blow your own sobriety to conduct a drinking experiment. But I think this is one data point showing that for some, the experience can be valuable. I know I’m actually much better off — more at peace with remaining sober by choice — as a result.
If you do stumble and decide to drink in a manner that goes against your goals, at least step-back and learn from the experience. As long as you learn from your mistakes, it’s awfully hard to call it a failure.
Did you use the 30 day solution to sobriety? Are you still doing that? What do you think of it?
Theresa
Hi Theresa,
Yes, I used Dave Andrew’s 30 Day Sobriety Solution, and I still am a subscriber. I think the program is very well done and I made it 51 days before I had a drink. Since then, I’ve had a few, mostly socially, but Dave has been working with me and I think I’m just going to quit for good.
Anyway, I found the 30 days very useful, and I’m planning to listen to them all again, since not only do they help with drinking, but also modifying my life to be more positive/etc. Dave is the ‘real deal’ and he really cares and keeps in touch even when he doesn’t have to.
If you’re thinking of quitting, sign-up for his free newsletter/etc. It’s got some good info, and he often sends-out special deals which can bring of the price down if that’s an issue.
Mike